


and lord don't let me break this

by TulipAnthousa (FairyChess)



Series: LAOFT NSFW [7]
Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: (Brief) Spanking, Bratty Sub Patton, Dom Drop, Dom/sub Play, Gentle Dom Anxiety | Virgil Sanders, M/M, Panic Attacks, Safeword Use, Service Top Anxiety | Virgil Sanders, Sub Logic | Logan Sanders, Switch Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders, Switch Morality | Patton Sanders, genuine but less than enthusiastic consent, if you just want some virgil + dom drop content, it's obviously part of a verse but honestly i think it makes sense without it, we've got elements of both in here
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-07
Updated: 2020-03-07
Packaged: 2021-02-28 18:09:30
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,026
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23051479
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FairyChess/pseuds/TulipAnthousa
Summary: Black ice: n; a thin coating of glaze ice on a surface, especially a road. The ice itself is not black, but visually transparent, allowing the often black road to be seen through it, and the typically low levels of visible ice pellets or snow surrounding black ice means that coated areas are practically invisible.
Relationships: Anxiety | Virgil/Creativity | Roman/Logic | Logan/Morality | Patton
Series: LAOFT NSFW [7]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1454113
Comments: 21
Kudos: 349





	and lord don't let me break this

**Author's Note:**

> the title is from 100 years by Florence + the Machine
> 
> and thank you to [@trivia-goddess](trivia-goddess.tumblr.com) for beta-reading and also for validating quite a few artistic choices i made in here that i was #nervous about - i’m certain i wouldn’t be even half as confident a smut writer if i didn’t have you, you are a Gift

It was a bit difficult for Virgil to remember that he’d been a little nervous about this evening at the moment.

Then again, he was surprised he usually managed to remember his own name during the bliss that was the slick warmth of one of his love’s mouths on his cock.

Logan glanced up through his lashes, his pupils blown and lips stretched wide as Virgil gently fucked his mouth, fingers tangled tight in Logan’s soft brown locks. Logan’s hand clutched at the back of Virgil’s thigh, blunt nails scrabbling like he was desperate for Virgil to go faster.

Looking up, Virgil made eye contact with their audience. Lounging on the couch across from the bed, Patton wore an expression that was clearly trying for innocent and failing utterly. Smiling lightly, he had one finger winding idly in his own curls and the other hand running across the neckline of silver lace dress he was wearing – though _wearing_ was probably an exaggeration, see as it was so short it covered essentially nothing, Patton’s nearly fully hard cock clearly visible. Patton’s eyes trailed down and up from Virgil’s face to Roman and Logan’s kneeling forms and back, and when he met Virgil’s eyes again his grin turned just the faintest bit wicked.

Virgil gave him a look they both knew meant _behave_ , and Patton returned with a smile they both knew meant _absolutely not._

Logan moaned suddenly around Virgil’s cock, and Virgil’s hips stuttered. Bringing his attention back to the gorgeous sight at his feet, he saw Roman had switched from sucking kisses into Virgil’s thigh to murmuring low praise into the shell Logan’s ear, his fingers brushing Virgil’s in Logan’s hair.

“Are you helping Logan, beloved?” breathed Virgil, tangling his other hand in Roman’s hair.

Roman smiled coyly up at him.

“Mhm,” he hummed, “You weren’t paying attention to us,”

“Needy,” said Virgil affectionately, scratching Roman’s scalp, “Do you want attention then?”

Roman nodded eagerly.

Virgil tugged a little on Logan’s hair, and Logan pulled off Virgil’s cock with a slick pop and shockingly little resistance.

Virgil only had a moment to wonder why, before Logan lunged for Roman and licked into his mouth without preamble.

Letting out a low hiss, Virgil watched, his fingers still buried in their hair. Roman’s expression went from teasing to _bliss,_ his lips falling open on a desperate moan. Virgil saw a flash of pink between their bitten-red lips, their tongues meeting wet and sloppy in the middle, and Virgil only managed to resist the urge to push them down onto the soft rug and fuck them senseless because he didn’t currently have anything on hand to fuck them both at the same time.

A third voice split the air, a noise so pitched and breathless it was almost a wail. Virgil turned his attention back to Patton, putting on his best unamused expression.

Patton was already looking back, eyes glittering gold and mischievous, his hand running up and down his cock in loose, almost lazy strokes.

“Uh-oh,” said Roman, very quietly into Logan’s mouth. Logan was clearly trying to contain a laugh in response, and Virgil’s heart gave an affectionate little wobble.

Virgil bent down to kiss them both on the forehead, before letting his hands slip from their hair and slowly crossing the room to Patton.

“Hello,” sang Patton, a little breathless.

Virgil lowered himself to kneel by the lounge so they were eye-level – Patton didn’t even pause stroking himself.

“What are you doing?” said Virgil, voice low.

“Hmm?” said Patton, “What do you mean, honey?”

And before Virgil could respond, Patton tossed his head back, rolled his hips and moaned so wantonly that Virgil lunged.

Grinning against Virgil’s temple, Patton knotted his fingers in Virgil’s hair as Virgil bit dark, bruising kisses into his throat.

“I told you,” growled Virgil, punctuating it with a sharp nip and relishing the way Patton shivered, “Not to touch yourself,”

“Oh, did you?” said Patton coyly, “I must have forgotten, sweetie, I’m sorry,”

“Liar,”

“Oh, well,” said Patton, smirking, “Nothing to be done, I guess,”

Patton squealed as Virgil swept him off the couch and stood in one motion.

“Do you even try to stay out of trouble?”

“Why on Earth would I do that?” said Patton, syrupy-sweet, and Virgil bit the inside of his cheek to keep from smiling at him.

Returning to the bedside, Virgil dropped Patton on top of the covers, restraining another smile when Patton bounced a little and giggled in response. Holding out his hands for Roman and Logan, he helped them to their feet and kissed their temples, one after the other.

“You’ve been so good for me,” he murmured, “Do you want to help?”

Roman nodded, but Logan didn’t seem to register the question, his face nuzzling into Virgil’s neck and his voice a low, wordless rumble in his chest.

“Logan?”

Logan looked up, his expression a little far away.

“Do you want to help?”

Blinking rapidly, Logan looked between Virgil and Patton – who gave him a much gentler smile – before shaking his head.

“Can I just… sit close by?” he said quietly.

“Of course,” said Virgil, pressing a handful of kisses to the side of Logan’s face, “You can have whatever you want, beloved. You’ve been such a good boy,”

Logan’s face flared a rosy crimson, giggling faintly.

He pulled away and Virgil released him only a little reluctantly. Logan climbed up on the bed next to Patton, and Virgil turned to Roman.

“You said I could help,” said Roman, pressing himself up against Virgil’s front and dragging his burning-warm fingertips down Virgil’s chest.

“I did,” said Virgil, running a hand up Roman’s side and smirking when Roman shivered, “Can you tie him to the headboard for me? On his stomach,”

Grinning, Roman nodded, and then he broke away too, moving around to the other side.

Virgil took his time, watching all of them get situated at the top of the bed. Patton didn’t put up the slightest protest turning over, eager and already flushing bright pink. Logan whispered something in his ear and they both giggled at whatever it was - Virgil was a little too keyed up to really listen to the words. Logan gave Virgil a furtive glance and Virgil pretended not to pay attention.

Patton was supposed to be in trouble, but Virgil would just about rather cut off his own ears than break up whatever sweet conversation those two were having.

Roman got in on it too, his voice a little darker, and Patton squirmed under the attention. By the time Roman had finished tying him (and Virgil couldn’t help but inspect it a little from where he sat, double-checking Roman’s knotwork), Virgil was kneeling at the foot of the bed, just behind Patton.

He reached out, running his hands up the outside of Patton’s thighs with a feather-light touch. He could see Patton’s cock hanging heavy between his legs, and Virgil’s stomach flipped. Cupping the roundness of Patton’s ass, Virgil squeezed, and Patton let out a delightful, strangled noise in response.

“You broke a rule, beloved,” said Virgil darkly.

“Hmm,” said Patton, his voice unsteady, “Whoopsie,”

Virgil squeezed a little harder and Patton moaned in response.

“Do you know what happens when you break a rule, Pat?”

“I bet you’re gonna tell me,”

Later, Virgil would recognize that the twisting in his stomach was less anticipation and more _panic,_ but as it was he didn’t even stop to think about it before he pulled his hand back and smacked sharply at Patton’s ass.

Last year, Virgil had been in the passenger seat of Remy’s car when Remy had hit a patch of black ice. Remy had regained control of the car before Virgil could grab him and vanish into the shadows, but those few seconds of weightless, untethered panic, surrounded by cursed metal and no clue what was happening, had easily been one of a bare dozen of times in his life Virgil had been well and truly terrified.

Black ice – that’s what this felt like.

His hands were still resting against Patton’s skin – where he’d… hit him, Virgil had _hit him –_ and Virgil pulled them away, shaking, his throat closing up and his ears ringing.

Virgil saw Logan sit up a little, and when Virgil met his eyes he felt something _crack_ in his chest.

Logan frowned suddenly.

“Virgi-”

“ _Red,”_ Virgil choked, strangled.

“Roman, can you untie me?” Patton said immediately, all the arousal vanished from his voice, and Logan practically lunged toward Virgil, quick and sharp movement like a darting fish.

Holding his hands out, palms up, he offered them to Virgil. But Virgil’s own palms felt like they were _burning,_ like he’d touched hot iron and not Patton, _Patton,_ stars, he’d _hit Patton-_

Virgil didn’t take the hands, pressing his fists to his chest and trying to think of anything else but the rising panic and nausea and _disgust-_

“Virgil,” said Logan, letting his hand fall to rest on his own thighs, “Can you find something orange in the room?”

Virgil made a garbled, questioning noise.

“Something orange, Virgil,” said Logan, gentle but firm, “Tell me something in the room you can see that’s orange,”

Eyes darting around the room, Virgil’s gaze rested on the pile of clothes near the door.

“Roman’s shirt,” he said, voice thin and strained, “The collar,”

“Good,” said Logan, smiling softly, “Very good, Virgil. Can you find something yellow?”

More searching, and on the other side of the bed, Virgil heard Roman begin to count, quiet and steady, as Virgil’s eyes found the bookshelf.

“Book,” he managed, though the book in question was really more of a golden-brown color.

“Perfect,” said Logan anyway, “Something green?”

“Couch,” said Virgil, quicker, “The embroidery,”

Logan went through the full spectrum of color, throwing in some extras to the rainbow like pink and silver and black, and when he finished he held out his hands again.

Virgil took them, and when Logan registered the shaking he twitched with what Virgil could tell was a tamped-down desire to frown.

Virgil managed to force his head to move, to look at Patton and Roman. Patton was watching him, calm and seemingly unruffled. Roman was much paler than Virgil was comfortable with.

“Roman?”

Roman shook his head.

“Later,” he said tightly, holding out his hand questioningly. When Virgil nodded, he laid his warm palm against Virgil’s cheek, and Virgil relaxed by another degree.

“Are you alright?” said Roman, tense.

_Alright_ was just barely pushing it, but Virgil nodded.

“Do you need anything?” Roman continued, moving away a little, “I can get you water-”

“Don’t go,” Virgil begged, voice wobbling and his eyes stinging suddenly.

Roman snapped back toward him, moving closer and shushing softly.

“I won’t, I won’t,” he soothed, “I’m not going anywhere, I’ll stay right here,”

Virgil leaned toward him and Roman tucked himself against his side, his face in Virgil’s neck.

Patton shuffled forward on his knees, still watching intently. Giving Virgil an encouraging smile, he took one of Virgil’s hands from Logan.

“Can you tell me what happened, honey?”

Virgil swallowed.

“You don’t have to do it right this second-” started Roman.

“I can’t hit you,” blurted Virgil, ragged, “I _can’t._ Not again,”

Patton’s soft, gentle smile didn’t budge at all.

“Then you won’t,” he said, his voice light but brooking absolutely no argument.

“I’m sorry,” said Virgil, before he could think it through.

Patton’s smile dropped immediately – between that, Roman’s indignant noise, and Logan’s low growl, Virgil instantly regretted the words.

“That wasn’t what I meant,” hedged Virgil.

“Do elaborate,” said Logan, clearly trying not to scowl at him, “Because it _sounded_ like you just tried to apologize for safe-wording, which is a violation of rules _you_ enforce religiously,”

Wincing, Virgil shifted awkwardly underneath all three of their unhappy stares.

“I just meant- I know you were… really excited,” he said haltingly, “How much you wanted it. And I…”

He trailed off, not knowing how to articulate it.

Narrowing his eyes, Patton tilted his head.

“Virgil,” he said slowly, “Did _you_ want to do this?”

Confused, Virgil blinked at him.

“Of course,” he said, bemused, “You asked,”

Patton’s frown deepened.

“I mean did you _want_ to?”

“I just said-”

“I know, baby, I-” Patton huffed, frustrated.

“If I may?” said Logan, and Patton nodded.

“I believe Patton is asking if this is something you… forced yourself to participate in, for his sake,”

“ _No_ ,” said Virgil incredulously, “Why wouldn’t I- why would I have to force myself? I wanted to do this for you, of course I did,”

“Virgil,” said Roman, and even quiet and pained, his voice cut across whatever Logan was beginning to say, “When Patton asked, did you even think about it before you said yes?”

Virgil’s brow furrowed.

“No,”

Patton took a sharp inhale.

“Okay,” he said quietly, “Okay, I’m caught up,”

“Caught up with _what?_ ” said Virgil, still utterly lost.

“What’s your favorite thing to do during sex?” asked Patton suddenly.

Virgil was baffled by the non-sequitur, but Patton just waited patiently for an answer.

“I’m not… sure?”

“Something you really like, then,”

Virgil considered.

“Edging you,” he said finally, “Or- I guess anything that makes you beg,”

Patton nodded.

“And if I told you I didn’t like it anymore and never wanted to do it again, would you ask me to do it for you anyway?”

Virgil reared back like he’d been slapped.

“Of course I wouldn’t,” he said, horrified and maybe a little hurt, “I would never,”

Patton raised both his brows, like he was waiting for something. When Virgil didn’t speak again, he sighed a little.

“Sweetheart,” he said patiently, “I don’t want to do _anything_ if you’re not _just_ as excited about it. Doing something just because I asked is different than doing something because you want to,”

They didn’t really _sound_ different to Virgil, at first – but when Virgil thought about it for a moment, put it next to what Patton had said, about if _Patton_ hadn’t wanted something, it clicked.

He frowned.

“Okay,” he said quietly, “I, um – I’m also caught up,”

Patton relaxed.

“Alright,” he said, “That’s good,”

“I didn’t- I just didn’t think about it, like that,” said Virgil.

He hadn’t thought about it all, really, which, now that they’d pointed it out, was obviously a problem. His neck was itching with embarrassment and prickling shame, but Patton shook his head, leaning over to cup Virgil’s cheeks.

“No one’s mad, honey,” said Patton. He _didn’t_ look mad, though he definitely did seem upset.

“Can I give you a kiss?”

Nodding, Virgil leaned in to meet him halfway. Patton didn’t go far when their lips parted, just pressed their foreheads together.

“What do you need?” he asked, “To feel better?”

The answer was immediately obvious, but it just made Virgil’s flush deepen.

“Virgil,” said Logan pointedly.

“… Are you hurt?” said Virgil, voice small.

Patton blinked a little.

“Oh- me?”

Virgil nodded.

Patton smiled, biting his lip, almost like he was- amused?

“I’m fine,” he assured.

“…What?” asked Virgil, getting the feeling he was missing something.

Patton waffled for a moment.

“… I don’t want you to think I’m poking fun at you,” he said, “Because I’m not, I promise,”

Virgil twitched.

“But, honey, really-”

He shook his head, smiling fondly.

“You didn’t hit me very hard at all. I should have said something right then, or at least checked in – it was obvious _something_ was going on. I just- I thought you were teasing, not _scared,_ ”

Virgil thought about protesting _scared_ , but, in hindsight, he wasn’t sure if he’d be able to get the words out.

“Can I…?”

He gestured awkwardly, but Patton seemed to get it without much help.

“Check?”

Virgil nodded.

“Of course, honey,”

Moving closer until he was nearly in Virgil’s lap, Patton let his hands fall from Virgil’s face to his chest, relaxing into Virgil’s loose hold. Hesitantly, Virgil ran his hands down Patton’s back to his thigh, and back up his sides to inspect Patton’s wrists. They were red from the rope, but already fading, and the mark on Patton’s behind hadn’t lasted even this long.

“I’m good, baby,” said Patton softly, “I’m not hurt,”

Considering the events of the past ten minutes, Virgil thought _now_ was an exceedingly strange time for him to burst into tears.

“Oh, _honey_ , oh, oh, oh,” cooed Patton, coaxing Virgil forward until he was reclined on the pillow with Virgil’s sniffling face pressed into his neck.

Virgil missed the motion or expression Patton made over Virgil’s shaking shoulders, but whatever it was made Roman press against Virgil’s back, warm and firm as sunlit stone. Fumbling for his hand, Virgil laced their fingers together and Roman squeezed back, pressing his lips to the back of Virgil’s neck.

“Nobody’s hurt,” Roman said softly against the skin, “We’re all fine,”

“Agreed,” said Logan, moving to lay beside Patton. He reached out and began to card his fingers through Virgil’s hair, which made fresh tears drip onto Patton’s collarbone.

“We are all safe,” murmured Logan, “Of course. _You_ are here, aren’t you? How could we not be?”

And _that_ somehow made the crying _worse,_ but Logan just leaned in and pushed their foreheads together, Roman squeezing Virgil’s hand and Patton humming soothingly, his mouth pressed to the crown of Virgil’s head.

“I love you,” Virgil croaked around a sob.

“I love you, too, honey,” Patton crooned.

Roman and Logan echoed him, speaking the words right against Virgil’s skin as they dropped kisses all over his face and shoulders.

Virgil’s face felt tacky, heavy and stuffed up with tears, which were still falling steadily from his eyes. In a minute, he thought, he’d ask for some water, or a cloth to clean his face, not realizing Roman was going to beat him to asking and just go get them.

But right now, Virgil didn’t want to ask for anything – certainly not for his loves to move _away._

So for the moment, Virgil would lay still, and let them wipe his tears and soothe the hollow ache in his chest, until everything was soft and warm again.

**Author's Note:**

> my smut blog is [@tulipanthousa](tulipanthousa.tumblr.com) and i would absolutely loft to talk about these soft horny guys with you, feel free to drop by


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